When people are trying to collaborate with business people few things are as demoralizing as the “cold shoulder.”
Whether it’s a blank stare in a meeting, an ignored email, or a lack of engagement in a group effort, the impact is more profound than most people realize. Outright conflict, which happens from time to time, can be addressed head-on. However, the silent dismissal of a cold shoulder quietly undermines progress, destroys trust, and fractures relationships.
The Subtle Sabotage
When we talk about collaborative environments – especially in sectors like Ontario energy, where cooperation is essential – every team member’s input is critical. Cold shoulders erode the foundation of collaboration. A team member’s silence or disengagement can be interpreted in several ways: disinterest, disapproval, or a lack of respect. Regardless of the intention, the outcome is usually the same…collective effort stalls and results suffer.
In regulated industries, like energy, where many stakeholders – from local distribution companies (LDCs) to municipalities to energy users – must work together, collaboration is a requirement for success. A single disengaged party can derail entire projects, delaying innovations, and preventing new solutions from reaching the market.
The Domino Effect of Disengagement
One individual’s cold shoulder can cascade into larger issues by –
Eroding Trust:
When a key partner or stakeholder withdraws or ignores input, others may feel their efforts are undervalued or unwelcome. This lack of acknowledgment diminishes trust, the cornerstone of any successful collaboration.
Stalling Creativity:
Ideas need momentum to develop. When someone is met with silence, it creates a vacuum that kills creativity. Innovative ideas are left unspoken, and potential breakthroughs are lost because the environment doesn’t feel safe or encouraging.
Diminishing Accountability:
Silence often leads to ambiguity. When one person refuses to engage, it’s difficult to establish shared goals or distribute responsibility effectively. This lack of clarity can result in missed deadlines, abandoned projects, or finger-pointing when things go wrong.
Breeding Resentment:
The individuals who put in the effort may start to feel resentful of those who don’t. This can spiral into toxic behaviours, where previously collaborative partners begin withholding their own contributions out of frustration.
An Example of Missed Opportunity
Consider the energy industry’s push toward digital transformation and data-driven decision-making. The benefits of advanced data sharing among local distribution companies (LDCs) and municipalities are clear:
- improved community planning,
- better service delivery, and
- efficient growth management.
However, when a key stakeholder decides to disengage or becomes non-responsive, these potential benefits remain theoretical.
Overcoming the Cold Shoulder Culture
The good news is that the damage of cold shoulders can be mitigated with intentional strategies –
Create a Culture of Openness:
Establish clear expectations for engagement. Make it known that all voices are valuable, and that silence can be more damaging than disagreement.
Address the Issue Directly:
Instead of letting silence fester, call it out tactfully. Approach the individual privately and ask if there are concerns or reasons for their disengagement. Often, this simple act of acknowledgment can break down barriers.
Build Psychological Safety:
Teams and partnerships thrive when there is a shared belief that it’s safe to take risks, voice ideas, and ask questions. Leaders should model vulnerability, show appreciation for feedback, and demonstrate active listening.
Measure Engagement:
In structured collaboration settings, like project teams or industry working groups, use simple metrics to track participation. Are emails being answered? Are meetings well attended? Are people contributing during discussions? If not, it’s time for a conversation.
Facilitate Digital Collaboration Tools:
Embrace digital tools that allow asynchronous contributions. Sometimes, a cold shoulder isn’t intentional but rather a result of different working styles or schedules. By offering diverse ways to engage—such as digital whiteboards, collaborative documents, or chat-based platforms—you lower the barriers to participation.
The Big Picture: Why We Need Everyone
My son Jack’s philosophy, “anything’s possible when it’s digital,” speaks to the limitless potential of our current technologies. But even the most advanced software tools can’t replace the value of human collaboration. In industries like energy, where the stakes are high and the players diverse, the willingness to engage and share perspectives is the only way to unlock true innovation.
